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Process of Becoming


What is your immediate thought when you hear the word BECOMING? I feel like it is such a beautiful and elegant word. I’m not sure I can fully capture the essence of how I feel when I hear the word becoming. I’m not sure why I have such strong emotion to this word, but I believe it is a powerful word. When you couple it with the word process you realize that there is transformation that comes or maybe another word to use would be emerging. There's something that shifts in my mind when I think about those words. It's almost like you're ready to see the ugly duckling turn into the beautiful swan. Have you ever stop to take time to think about what can emerge from you? Maybe that doesn't sound so strong and powerful when you think of yourself, but I want to tell you that when transformation emerges there can be beauty!

So now that we've discussed becoming, what do you think when you hear the word PROCESS? For me this word doesn't bring up any powerful exciting emotions. Instead I prefer this word just go away. Process isn't something that sounds fun, beautiful, powerful any of those things. For me when I hear the word process, I think tactical, boring, necessary but do we have to? I know that sounded like one of my kids, but really I don't get the same sense of emotion around process as I do becoming. So I guess now you can guess. I'm not a fan of PROCESS!

While I don't like the "process" of something I do understand that it is necessary. Everything and everyone will at some point in their life go through a process. That is what transforms us. It's in the process that we begin to look, feel, act, and become transformed. When I think of going through a process, I'm often reminded of a diamond. When you think about a diamond you immediately picture the stunning jewel that so many love to wear. The big sparkle that comes from a diamond. You don't often think about how it is created. Regardless of where the creation happens, In the natural or in a lab, diamonds are created under extreme heat and pressure. Not to mention when you are mining diamond they are deep in the earth where they are not easy to get to. I went to a South African diamond mine on one of my there and it was so interesting to see how they are taken from the earth's core and the process of which they have to use to mine the precious stones. First we had to go down deep into the earth in a small shaft that would descend us deep into the mine where it was damp, and dark. We had to wear hats with lights on them, and while it was set up for tourists, they did show how hard it was to mine the diamonds and the system they had to put into place. It wasn't a pleasant place to work, it was long hours, tough conditions, and then you had to careful chip away to find the hidden treasure. These treasures were created under extreme conditions in the earth, it is said that the temperatures have to be extremely hot and there has to be pressure from the earth to crystallize carbon into rough diamonds. Once the diamonds are mined the process doesn't stop there. The ore (rock) where the diamonds are, is taken to a crusher where it is reduced in size and make it more manageable, then it goes into the scrubber, this is where the pieces are screened and separated. Then there is a process of separation where they add solution and water to get the diamond to separate from the core, and then it goes on to more cleaning and scrubbing. Once all of that is done then it is separated out for sale to raw diamond buyers. Have you noticed we haven't even talked about the cutting and shaping of the diamond yet, to get to the product we wear. So clearly there is a long and intense process that diamonds have to undergo to be the beautiful jewels we adorn ourselves in today.

Oh here's another one, what about olive's. I use olive oil all the time and I love to try olive oil from other countries. It does have a different taste depending on the region where it is made. That is because the process may be different but the olives are different. Olive oil, is pressed from the olive which is not an easy process, it is multistep and very specific to get the best oil. Similar to the diamonds, it is a long process not as simple as just crushing the olive, in fact there is a very specific method to get the best oil out of the olives. Oh and what about wine! Wine doesn't just appear in bottles, it's a process. The grape fines have to be planted, tended to and grapes grow on the vines, then they have to be harvested. Like the olives they are then pressed to get the juice, and then there is an entire process to actually creating the wine itself. The process is more complicated than what I'm laying out here, but you understand where I'm going with this. One last example we must not omit is the caterpillar transforming and then emerging into a butterfly. This amazing process of transformation requires preparation, seclusion, and emerging in order to see the full transformation of the butterfly. In fact in all of the instances noted above there can be instances where the transformation, wasn't exactly what was expected, or if you decide to rush the process the outcome isn't the same. It won't provide the best oil, or wine. The butterfly may not make it out of the cocoon or die in the midst of the process is rushed. There are specific steps and reasons for those steps in the process. Each step is designed to put just the right environment for growth, then the right amount of heat and pressure to create a result that is so different than the beginning phases. Think about where you are at right now, in this very moment, and realize that the pressures and heat of your circumstances are only temporary. They will change but they are designed to bring something out of you that you don't even know exists. The grapes didn't know they could become grape juice, and the grape juice didn't know it could be transformed into wine. In each stage of the olive or grape, it is usable, but without applying a little pressure you wouldn't know that there is more to that grape and olive, than just something to eat. Think about that. Without the pressure applied to your life, you wouldn't have known that you are able to stand in the midst of every storm. You wouldn't have realized all that you have accomplished so far. It is part of the process of becoming.

Things have a natural course they need to take and unfortunately, I don't like the timelines. I'm not very good with the "P" word (patience). UGH that word makes me cringe because I just want to see the end result. I want to see the final product. I want to admire the butterfly not wait for it to emerge out of the cocoon. Some things can't be rushed! If we rush the process, the outcome will not be to its full potential. Let's look at it this way, raise your hand if you have ever done a fad diet to lose 10lbs in a week? Okay, maybe I'm the only person, but I doubt it. We have all done the crash diets where we need to lose weight quickly so we eat cabbage soup for a week, and then go off for a few days and eat it again. Only to find that once I'm completely tired of cabbage soup and I don't want another spoonful, all the weight I lost is back and then let's just add a few pounds for fun! Sound familiar. The process of taking time to eat right (well balanced) and exercise is more than I really want to commit to, but if I continue to rush the process the results will not be satisfactory for the long run.

I’m currently having my kitchen renovated and while I'm waiting in great expectation for the outcome, the process is painful and costly. What do I mean exactly, well it is a huge expense to hire the contractor, buy materials, buy pretty new things, all of that has a cost to it. In addition to that, we have to clear out all the cabinets, and pantry area to ensure that everything is cleaned out so my house is an absolute mess, and in shambles with no storage area for the items to retreat to. So it is painful! Then when you have the workers arriving at 7am to start, that means that you have to give up some of your normal "getting ready" time to ensure that you are dressed and ready for company early in the morning. That can be uncomfortable. Do you see where I'm going with this? Anything that needs to be transformed is a painful, costly, and uncomfortable. Sure my kitchen could have stayed the same, and I could have lived with it, but the reality is the cabinets were falling apart, the floors were breaking, the appliance were ready to go at any minute, and my house typically is full of people with lots of love and joy, so over time it will wear down if I don't invest in it now.

As a coach I work with people that want to see change in their lives. They understand and know that in order to become all they can be they need someone to help them through the process. The process is uncomfortable, and at times down right painful. It has to be a decision that you make on your own what you are willing to do, and give. I believe that investing in yourself now, will produce a legacy for a lifetime. As you go through the process of becoming, you will allow others to become who they are meant to be. You will teach your children to invest in themselves, because there are hidden treasures that are waiting to be unlocked. If 2020 didn't show us anything else, it showed me that there are so many things yet to explore, and understand about myself. There is more to me than where I have found my comfort zone. It's time again, to shed the cocoon and emerge and become what I have yet to be! Are you ready to embrace the process of becoming?

If you answered yes, and you feel a tugging of inspiration as you read this but need help getting started we are here to walk on this journey with you! We're better together! Reach out and set up time to talk with us.

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